Well I missed the kick in the big game, failed my driving test
Misspelled my ex-girlfriend’s name on the tattoo on my chest
'Cuz I can’t do nothing right, and I can’t seem to get along
I’ve forgotten what it looks like on the other side of wrong
I picked a fight with a boxer, scratched an Angel’s hog
Gave a heart attack to the doctor and lost my mama’s dog
I hung a left on a red light and lost my right to drive
Just show me to the shallow end and I’m sure to dive right in
'Cuz I can’t do nothing right, and I can’t seem to get along
I’ve forgotten what it looks like on the other side of wrong
So I’m sitting on this barstool in this dirty downtown bar
Drinking up my money and I piss it in the bathroom stall
A man of my disposition should steer clear of alcohol
But if I didn’t make bad decisions, I wouldn’t make no decisions at all
'Cuz I can’t do nothing right, and I can’t seem to get along
I’ve forgotten what it looks like on the other side of wrong
