My Country

This is my country, my damn country
Gimme my country, you can keep the rest
This is my country, my damn country
And it don’t mean a thing if it don’t pass the test
If you ain’t never cheated or been cheated on
Then take off your boots, you rhinestone fraud

Gimme cheating, drinking, and outlaw songs
Hard times, foolish pride, done me wrong
Flirting with the devil, get right with the man
Amen, pain songs, one night stands
You can keep your picket fence fantasies
And put a cork in your high school memories

This is my country, my damn country
Gimme my country, you can keep the rest
This is my country, my damn country
And it don’t mean a thing if it don’t pass the test
If you ain’t never spent a single night in jail
Then get another job and I’ll see you in hell

I’m drawn like a moth to the neon lights
I need a bucket of beer and someone to fight
Don’t call yourself country if your music is shitty
Or this Carolina boy’ll take you down to Fist City
You know who you are, I ain’t gonna name names
Just keep your hands off my country and go back from where ya came

My country, my damn country
Gimme my country, you can keep the rest
This is my country, my damn country
And it don’t mean a thing if it don’t pass the test
If you ain’t never done something you regret
Well, then I’m proud of ya, now git

Get that pussified, polished, pop song piece of
Glorified nursery rhyme outta my face
Wintertime, springtime, summertime, autumn
Show me to the jukebox and Yoakam if you got ‘em
I want country like Johnny, country like Merle
Country like Loretta, that honky tonk girl
Country like Townes, country like Travis
I’m a country-fried junkie with a bad habit
Country like Kris, country like Gretchen
If you ain’t cooking country then get out of the kitchen

I want country like Hank one, two, and three
Dropping like peaches from the family tree
Country like women, whiskey, and wheels
Yeah I know if it’s country cuz I know how it feels
Country like Waylon, country like Willie
Country like lightning in a hillbilly

This is my country, my damn country
Gimme my country, you can keep the rest
This is my country, my damn country
And it don’t mean a thing if it don’t pass the test
If you can’t sing along to Tear in my Beer
Then don’t forget your coat and get the f*** out here